Dear Tasha: You're Cordially Invited To My Existential Crisis Party!

Crossing the Bay Bridge into the city on my way back from Woodland.

Drawing workshop (Dah lah 6 hours of drawing class per week. On top of that we have to attend 3 hours of workshop.)

I use pastels for the rough and charcoal pencils for the actual drawing. 

The dining hall across the street was closed so I had to grab breakfast from the Sugar Cafe.

On Saturday, we went to a shitty house party, but we looked good doing so. 

[This shall be a weekly post as a letter to my lumpster, Cupcake aka Tasha Iman aka Cottonball83. You don't have to read it, duh.]

Dear Tasha,

I'm throwing an existential crisis party soon because finals can be a brokeass bitch tryna get makeup instead of food. You know what I mean. It's tiring. Instead of sitting at my desk reading and writing notes, I have to go to Fedex and print out close to $70 worth of boards for my Merchandising project. Art school is expensive, as we all know now. Here's a lowdown on my finals:

Marketing: The only paper, but we have to present an event idea to the creator of Glanse app. 

Merchandising: Create a window display for a department store. You've seen it. 

Color & Design: A notebook of all the work we have done over the semester, an analysis of an editorial, and a collection/photo shoot based on colour schemes of your choice. I'm planning to do a makeup shoot so that I can play with colours, you might see it soon!

Drawing: 3 best drawings in class/workshop, 3 sketches of a place using different medias. 

It sounds like fun come to think of it, but it is tiring. I have so much to do and you know how I feel about time. I'll get through this. In less than two weeks, I'm free to binge watch Netflix, devour books on Oyster (planning to read Philosophy to at least understand what life is all about because right now I can't see it, constantly feeling like I'm living a dream.) & just explore the rest of California and Oregon. 

My week is going swimmingly so far. How is yours? It's 12:17am and I'm ahead of my schedule so I shall reward myself with a movie. 

Till then,

Miss you loads.

On Location: Kayo Books

Juxtapoz $3 ; Absolutely Zippo! $15

Living in a city means constantly stumbling upon new spots. Thus, I've decided to document such glorious finds as we all know urban exploration is oh so thrilling.

This week, Nikki and I decided to check out a bookstore that carries pulp fiction, erotica and generally books that are NSFW classified. Nikki refers to it as 'the sex shop', which it kinda is in some sense because look at the titles on display [refer to image 2 & 4]. Besides the erotica/gay/lesbian/prison genres, they do have a lot of other books, such as those produced by the Beats generation, war stories and all forms of other literature. Most of these books, if not all, are secondhand, but they are in extremely good condition at really good prices.

Browsing in this bookstore can take hours. There's so much to see what with such a wide selection available, it's tough to stop your inner bibliophile from imploding. Venturing upstairs because I had to tear myself away from the art books, I met up with Nikki. She told me about a book that was of a Nazi's pilot diary. It was sad because he didn't believe in what he did. On a brighter note, she found a Canadian bill in one of the books along with this note:

Kayo Books is instantly my new favourite bookstore, replacing Bound Together only because Kayo is within walking distance. Now I don't have to take the MUNI all the way to Haigh-Ashbury or Mission just to get my zine fix.

This time, I tried my very best to refrain from getting any new books. Yet my lack of self control decided it was a good idea to get a copy of Juxtapoz, an art magazine, and Absolutely Zippo!: An Anthology of a Fanzine 1988 - 1998. My reasoning: I probably won't be able to find this around, so may as well get it now.

Kayo Books

814 Post St

San Francisco, CA, 94109

(415) 749-0554

Till then,
Live life with no regrets. [Hook x2]

November Favourites

7th Nov - 9th Nov: Reno
It was slump week. I jumped on board at the idea of a spontaneous trip to Reno, Nevada. 6 hours on the Megabus right at the very front on the top deck. The view was amazing. Lost all the images because I fried my phone, but hey, that calls for another trip to Reno. Every semester I face a slump week and the only remedy is to go on a spontaneous trip to rejuvenate all energy that has been lost.

10th Nov: Meeting Julian Casablancas
I've talked about this, so no more. Still a highlight though.

18th Nov: The 1975 live
They were amazing live. Matty sounds exactly the same, probably even better live. When Me came on and everyone was just silent, goosebumps ran up and down my spine. It's moments like that that reminds me I'm alive.

21st Nov: Field trip to Japanese Tea Garden
The best thing about art school would be the field trips. Leaving the classroom behind and being in a new environment that you have to sketch onto paper are moments that I will savour. It was beautiful, more images on my Instagram and Tumblr.

26th - 29th Nov: Thanksgiving break
Unintentional artsy shot of a taco from Taco Bell. Hard shell + soft shell, the best of both worlds really. Thanksgiving break was filled with food coma inducing delicacies, unconventional company and laid back car rides.

Oyster Books
The Spotify/Netflix version for books, this has kept me occupied as I wait for buses that are never on time. Currently reading Philosophy 101 because I want to understand the larger meaning of life or at least catch a glimpse of it. This could be a momentary existential crisis in university even though it has only been one semester.

Shoplifting from American Apparel by Tao Lin
Not too dense, I finished this book in a sitting. (That's saying a lot as I'm a slow reader and get distracted easily.) It's an engaging story as you follow Sam to NYU libraries, shoplifting in American Apparel and his short stint in jail.

Favorite quotes:
"Our bios: 'They lived in poverty writing their masterpieces.'"

"When I'm talking to someone I think 'can I use this dialogue in a book,'" said Luis. "If the answer is no, I try talking to someone else."

You can read a snippet here.

The Princess Bride
A proper fairy tale like story that reminded me of my childhood with humour that would cause you to giggle like a kid again. Rescuing princesses, escaping eels, venturing into Fire Swamp, The Princess Bride is made for a night in when you feel like leaving the world behind and stepping into a fantasy.

The Dreamers
I like the idea of watching films in a palace, breaking the world record for running through the Louvre, reading books that require thought and discussions. The best part of this movie are the film splices made in reference to other films. Does that even make sense?

Hard Candy
I've been meaning to watch this for awhile now but after reading this film review on The Pulp Zine, I immediately decided to watch it. Throughout the movie it made me so tense watching this and when it was all over, I had to let out a sigh. This is a movie dealing with pedophilia and rape culture. Personally, I thought this was a damn good movie, especially when it came to the message. Read the well worded film review after watching.

Favourite quote:
“Just because a girl acts like a woman, doesn’t mean she is ready to do what a woman does.”

Human Sadness by Julian Casablancas + the Voidz
Probably not everyone's cup of tea, but this song evokes emotion unlike any other song I've ever heard. It could just be me and my off the walls emotions, but I do hope that you guys feel what I feel. It's not necessarily sadness. Be warn, it is an 11 minute song.

Vanity, overriding wisdom, usually common sense.


High Street by Blood Orange
The late Michael Jackson doing the moon walk on the telly and I was like "who's bad?"

Danger In The Dancehall by Jesse Woods
Walk with the creatures of the moon. Cause we're young, and life's a vacation.

Back Of The Hand by The British Expeditionary Force
Listen with the windows down on a clear night drive.

Till then,
May the last month of 2014 kick ass.

Fast Animals

Thrifted blazer, Necklace from Markets, H&M crop top, skirt & boots,

MNG purse. 

{Image credit: Ashley Fenison}

8am classes are the worst when it comes to outfit planning the night before, especially when you have to factor in the rain. So I decided to wing it and after multiple jacket fittings, I threw on my trusty blazer that fits like a glove. When in doubt, pick a piece that stands out and keep the rest simple. In this case, it was my skirt with high slits. 

The rain has been killing my vibe, because the thought of getting from one point to another, even to a museum, just brings me down. Bright side, the California drought is over. 

Winter break countdown: 17 days. Life as a nomad sounds appealing due to the unpredictability of your days. You technically know where you'll be but what the day consists of and whether you would be sleeping in a motel or crashing at a friend's place are factors that are constantly changing. I like the idea of not having fixed plans. However things may be, I would definitely keep all of you updated. 

Till then,

12 hour Amtrak train rides shall be a treat.

Back To The Grind

Thrifted bomber jacket, Asos crop top, H&M jeans & boots, Hamsa hand from Markets. 

The sun is setting earlier now that it is consistently raining in the city. California has been experiencing a drought so it is a nice change, but not when you step out of the Thai restaurant only to be greeted by raindrops. Note to self: carry your mini umbrella around in the future. 

My Malaysia wardrobe isn't equipped for such chilly weather, so off to the stores I shall go for chunky sweaters and oversized cardigans. Currently in dire need of knits. 

Till then, 

I'll figure it out. 

On Track

It has been exactly 106 days since I left home. Studying abroad is not the same as going on vacation. After much thought about returning home for summer, I decided against it, because there is really nothing back home for me except my family and friends. What I mean is that for future growth, Malaysia just isn't for me anymore. The opportunities here are limitless. The American dream is true, although discrimination does affect everything, but your effort and dedication can always counteract that.

School has been really good. One would think that AAU is a joke, because of its 100% admissions rate, but let me tell you, my class has gone from 20 people to 10. People are dropping out like dead flies and it is only the first semester. The workload can be intense but with proper time management and hard work, it is manageable. I can still visit museums and binge watch 3 movies in a day.

The amount of concerts here are amazing. In the span of 3 months, I've already seen Bombay Bicycle Club, Childish Gambino and The 1975. There are still a lot more to go, I can sense it in my bones. Not to mention, Outside Lands and possibly Coachella if I play it right. House parties and dorm parties are mediocre. State schools are much better party wise if you are into binge drinking and beer pong.

Assignments are very hands on in art school. Photoshop skills come in extremely handy, especially for notebook pages and presentations. It seems that my internship with TiC came in super handy in the long run. Internships are a great stepping stone for a lot of careers. In America, everyone expects you to have experience, so you need to get what you can now and start working towards it.

Meeting Julian Casablancas was unexpected. I missed his concert as I was on my way back from Reno. On the day that I met him, I found out that he was having a signing over at Amoeba on Haight. My lovely roommate ditched her class in order to accompany me because my phone was fried and thank God she did because I would've been stuck in the middle of nowhere thanks to the switch of MUNI tracks.

Drawing class field trips are fun because we don't get to sit around in a room for 6 hours. We get to see and sketch beautiful places. Take the Japanese Tea Garden for example. Art school is amazing, because this is what I like to do and even though it is a lot of work, I enjoy doing what I do. That's what counts in the long run, I would like to think. So much has happen and there are so many more adventures ahead. I'm grateful to be here.

Reading on the fire escape as the sunsets, walking in the city when it is foggy, visiting new places with great company and just seeing a whole new world at your pace can be liberating. Homesickness comes in waves, but ultimately, I wouldn't go back home if given the chance. I like it here.

This has been an update of sorts. I'm reviving this blog because I'm ready to start documenting my adventures here. It's gonna be one hell of ride, it already has.

Till then,
Talk to you soon.